I took one of those Presidential Candidate Selector Quizzes, and much to my dismay I am still a bleeding-heart liberal, even if I do oppose a federally mandated minimum wage*.

* To clarify: I don’t favor an across-the-board number, as our nation contains several economies. I would like a requirement that each region have a minimum living wage specially calibrated to the economic particulars of the area.

Without any further ado, my results:

1. Theoretical Ideal Candidate (100%)
2. Dennis Kucinich (83%)
3. Barack Obama (80%)
4. Wesley Clark (not running, endorsed Clinton) (74%)
5. Joseph Biden (70%)
6. Hillary Clinton (69%)
7. Alan Augustson (campaign suspended) (68%)
8. Christopher Dodd (68%)
9. John Edwards (67%)
10. Al Gore (not announced) (66%)
11. Michael Bloomberg (says he will not run) (63%)
12. Mike Gravel (56%)
13. Bill Richardson (55%)
14. Ron Paul (45%)
15. Kent McManigal (campaign suspended) (43%)
16. Rudolph Giuliani (41%)
17. John McCain (35%)
18. Mike Huckabee (32%)
19. Elaine Brown (28%)
20. Mitt Romney (26%)
21. Alan Keyes (26%)
22. Tommy Thompson (withdrawn, endorsed Giuliani) (26%)
23. Chuck Hagel (not running) (24%)
24. Newt Gingrich (says he will not run) (22%) 25. Sam Brownback (withdrawn) (19%)
26. Fred Thompson (18%)
27. Duncan Hunter (17%)
28. Tom Tancredo (17%)
29. Jim Gilmore (withdrawn) (14%)
30. Stephen Colbert (4%)

I also took a similar test dealing with Religion.

1. Secular Humanism (100%)
2. Unitarian Universalism (91%)
3. Theravada Buddhism (87%)
4. Non-theist (86%)
5. Liberal Quakers (64%)
6. Neo-Pagan (38%)
7. Mainline – Liberal Christian Protestants (34%)
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8. Taoism (30%)
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9. Jainism (28%)
10. Orthodox Quaker (28%)
11. Hinduism (24%)
12. Mahayana Buddhism (24%)
13. Bahai (20%)
14. New Age (19%)
15. Seventh Day Adventist (17%)
16. Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (13%)
17. Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (13%)
18. Eastern Orthodox (13%)
19. Islam (13%)
20. Jehovah’s Witness (13%)
21. New Thought (13%)
22. Orthodox Judaism (13%)
23. Reform Judaism (13%)
24. Roman Catholic (13%)
25. Scientology (13%)
26. Sikhism (13%)
27. Mainline – Conservative Christian Protestant (10%)

Nice to know I’m more of a Quaker than a Jew. My grandparents must be rolling in their graves, which they are no doubt test-driving right now seeing as they’re rapidly approaching 80.

So, readers, let us know: How did you score on these tests? Drop a comment with your results!